Saturday, February 21, 2009

Funniest NBA Trade

When the ESPN ticker scrolled across the screen and announced this trade, I literally laughed out loud. Larry Hughes to the Knicks with Jerome James and Tim Thomas heading to Chicago. I hope that the GM's did this move to give NBA fans like me a good chuckle.

This trade involves maybe the three most disinterested players ever to play in the NBA.

Jerome James - Has made $30 million dollars to sit on the Knicks bench and eat... a lot. Has played 15 minutes the last two years and is perfectly healthy. This viedo posted on this forum shows his Knicks career in a nutshell.
http://www.knicksonline.com/forums/showthread.php?p=85337

Tim Thomas - If you google "Tim Thomas lazy" you get 223,000 results. I think that defines his career.

Larry Hughes - Here are his quotes:
"I play to enjoy myself, some people take this the wrong way, but winning a championship is not what I base everything on."
"I wouldn’t take being unhappy and not being myself and winning."
"I was asked to sacrifice for the team to win and for everybody, I guess, get paid. That is what was told to me and I wasn’t happy with that."

I guess Larry Hughes going to play for Mike D'Antoni is a match made in heaven for him. D'Antoni loves to get up shots in "7 seconds or less" and Larry Hughes has not found a contested jumper in transition that he does not like. I give this trade an A+.... in comedy.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Spring Break Odds


When a guy fantasizes about spring break, they think about chilling on the beach, pounding beer, and pulling in quality strange. For me this is the perfect opportunity to combine spring break with gambling odds.

One of my good buddies at home, Kerver, has gone through some rough patches since the prosperous summer and fall of 2006. Whether it be bad luck, bad game, or girlfriends that do not put out (yikes!), Kerver has gone through it all. But, this spring break he is looking to bust out.

Kerver has several things going for him. He is going to Fort Myers for a week and has a sizable house close to the beach. He is not setting his standards too high (anything 5 and above*) and is ready to unleash his game on the beaches and bars of the greater Fort Myers area. One con that he has working against him is that he has no connection to any ladies in the area. Thus any hookup will be completely strange.

A panel of nine members of US has estimated his odds of getting lucky at 4.64%.

The gambling line is set at 21-1. We encourage you to comment and say which side you would bet on.



* NOTE: A 5 on our 10 point scale of rating girls is defined as something you would not find attractive sober. It is something that is mediocre looking even at closing time of the bar but is not that horrible to settle for. You can easily defend this hookup by claiming wastedness and your buddies will not give you that much shit for it. This hookup is still 1.5x better than anything Matthews dates.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Dunk Contest: Lame

I look forward to the dunk contest every year. I was very excited for this years after Dwight Howard's performance last year. But last nights contest was a big letdown and incredibly lame. The winner, Nate Robinson, did a dunk Romona Robinson could pull off by jumping off someones back. However, all was not lost. LeBron is saying that he will do the contest next year, which will bring some necessary hype to the event. LeBron is easily the best in game dunker I have ever seen and has me salivating imagining the dunks he could do with a whole year to prepare. My bet is that he will dunk by taking off from several feet behind the free throw line.

My dream scenario for next years contest:

LeBron James
Andre Iguodala
Dwyane Wade
Demar Derozen (assuming he enters the NBA draft, if not then Josh Smith)

Let me know who you all would like to see in next years contest.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Rivlary Talk

With this week being ESPN's 'Rivalry Week' headlined by of course Duke-UNC, careful somewhere Dicky V. heard this mention and got a little too 'excited.' While it is a great rivalry, is it the best in sports? Here's my list of top 5, and shocking to about everyone there will be no New York Giants reference in this.

5) Alabama vs. Auburn football
4) Army vs. Navy football
3) New York Yankees vs. Boston Red Sox
2) Ohio State vs. Michigan
1) Duke vs. UNC

Okay, okay, I agree with ESPN. Why though? Because of the proximity, 8 miles separate these two, closer than any other rivalry. Unlike the Yankees and Red Sox they play only 2-3 times a year. The importance of the game as well. More often than not these two teams are in the top-10 if not higher. The same goes for OSU-Michigan usually. The third is the fan base. Sleeping out in a tent for 40-plus days, says something. You don't do that for a normal game. Let us know your lists.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Cavs-Lakers Game Blog

Game Recap
- The Cavs got just flat out abused on the glass in the second half. That was a piss poor effort by the Cavs at blocking out Lamar Odom.
- The Cavs offense bogged down in the second half. LeBron held the ball way too long looking to try and make plays. Also, LeBron didn't finish in the lane as well as he usually does.
- I feel like the Cavs were hot in the first half and fell in love with their jumpers in the second half. If they are to beat LA in the finals, they need to not have such a disparity in points in the paint.
- Not having Delonte West hurt the Cavs in that they could not slide LeBron over to cover Lamar Odom. LeBron had to stick on Kobe and the other Cavs were getting abused by Odom.

Second Quarter
- Varejao's activity has been key. He has absolutely controlled the defensive boards.
- Daniel Gibson's jump shot looks off. His balance with his legs and feet looks like it is different than last year.
- The Cavs were +2 with LeBron on the bench. The Lakers bench is generally regarded as the best in the league and the Cavs won that battle in this quarter.
- Good thing there are not 1-and-1's in the NBA. Lamar Odom misses the first free throw more often than any other player I have ever seen.

First Quarter
- Pau Gasol can pretty much get whatever shot he wants. Cleveland is playing him straight up in the post and not bringing a double.
- LeBron has not forced too much so far and is letting the game come to him. He is getting his teammates involved but look for him to attack more the second half of quarter number 2.
- Having Z to stretch the floor is huge. He will get at least 15 shots today with how the Lakers play defense.

Pregame
- The roles have reversed since the last time these two teams met in LA. The Cavs were woefully undersized inside without Z and Andrew Bynum was healthy for the Lakers. Bynum was able to overwhelm Varejao and Wallace with his sheer size. Pau Gasol is a much better defensive matchup for Varejao.
- The Cavs will be able to successfully use their small lineup today (LeBron playing some 4) as LeBron is able to handle Lamar Odom defensively.
- Not having Delonte West really hurts against the Lakers. He is the Cavs best perimeter defender and would guard Kobe til crunch time when LeBron will take over that duty.
- The under/over for times Kobe and LeBron's MSG performances will be mentioned on ABC's telecast is set at +/- 387.
- In the story line everyone is following, Shannon Brown makes his vengeful return to Cleveland.

Prediction: It will be a tight game thoughout the first three quarters. Being at home, Cleveland and LeBron will get favorable calls down the stretch and end up winning by about 10.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

The pressure of being a college basketball coach

Here's my story in today's Kernel about the pressure facing Gillispie to win at Kentucky. What do you think? I'll respond later with my input on most UK fans and the team:

Three games. That’s all it takes in Lexington to go from the pinnacle of the Southeastern Conference to hearing the sound of boos.

He came in as a savior. Three well-documented, surprising losses and a 20-second ESPN halftime interview later, UK men’s basketball head coach Billy Gillispie has remained in the media spotlight. And one day after his third consecutive loss, he is faced with more pressure and a new challenge.

On Wednesday, Darrell Bird of CatsPause.com reported that Patrick Patterson said players verbally confronted each other in the locker room following Tuesday’s loss.

Patterson told Bird that Gillispie stood in the locker room and let the players say what was on their minds. UK Athletics spokesman John Hayden said there was no comment on the story.

“Patrick just came out and started talking, and I asked him if Gillispie was in the locker room,” Bird said in a phone interview. “He said, ‘Oh yeah, (Gillispie) was there.’ Pat just spoke, said there was a heart-to-heart talk after a three-game losing streak.”

Big Blue Nation has grown restless, shown by the chorus of boos at halftime during UK’s 66-57 loss to Mississippi State on Tuesday, but the fans aren’t necessarily putting the blame on Gillispie.

Former UK head coach Joe B. Hall said such behavior is caused by the tradition of UK basketball.

“Boos happen during a bad run. I heard them too,” said Hall, who went 13-13 in his second season at UK. “Kentucky fans are that demanding because of the tradition here. You just need to win.”

Gillispie and his Cats won’t get a chance to win again until Feb. 10 against rival Florida. Former UK basketball great Tony Delk said winning is the cure to the boo birds.

While Delk never experienced jeers at Rupp Arena, he said he understands how Gillispie feels. During the 1993-1994 season, Delk’s sophomore year, the Cats lost two consecutive games. He remembers the team making sure they defeated Louisiana State to stop the streak and keep the fans happy.

“Fans do expect great things out of our team,” Delk said in a phone interview with the Kernel. “We’re that kind of team and program. The fans are trying to be patient but we also want instant success out of him and the team.”

While that could turn a lot of heads in Lexington, Clayton Barrett, a finance sophomore and UK fan, said he doesn’t have a problem with the story of a locker room confrontation.

“I don’t have a problem with it,” Barrett said. “They showed their emotion and hopefully that can translate over to the court now.”

While every UK fan has his or her own belief of what will turn the Cats’ losing ways around, Delk is convinced it’s quite simple: win.

“What cures everything is winning. You have to put what happened behind you,” Delk said. “But we need to focus on defense and everything will fall into place. We have to control the ball and value the ball.

“Nothing is more important than winning though.”

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Quick reactions to UK-MSU

Wow, what a difference three games can make. Two weeks ago the Cats were a Top-25 team, and a potential 4-6 seed in March. Now, they are an average SEC team, in a very average league. Everybody seemed to lose the ability to score, dribble and most importantly rebound. Some quick notes I saw during the game.

-Why not go small? Mississippi State played four guards and Varnado. Why in the hell did UK keep sending Stevenson and Patterson out there. You had Stevenson on a guard! A point guard nonetheless! Why not go with a team of Liggins, Meeks, Porter, Miller and Patterson. Rotate Patterson, Stevenson and Harrellson in for each other. If you bring in Harrellson with the four guards, his shooting ability would bring Varnado out of the post. Then with the guards you can just run a platoon of those listed above, Harris and Galloway. You could switch anything between those four then.

-For the love of God UK, get in the gym and do nothing but basic shooting drills. They shot a mere 35 percent from the field. When teams are going to dare you to shoot, hit it. It's as simple as that. They sagged so far off of Porter, Miller, Liggins and Harris that it was like they were simply shooting warming up. No one was near them.

-Defend the three. UK had no defensive answer for Mississippi State who hit 14 from long distance. I know a lot of them were deep, but they had to see some of that on tape. Often times though UK didn't even get a hand in their face.

-Does anyone in America have a bigger green light than Meeks? He might have a bigger one than Curry. Some of his shots are so bad. He tries to take the team on his shoulders, which I understand why he does, but he tries too much.

-The key to this teams success in running. They are a terrible half-court team. They need to get back to that. Get the ball, quick outlet and run. In the half court, they really need to get Patterson touches and go inside out. Don't settle for the three.

-They have a week off now until Florida next Tuesday. Let's see what happens then. It's going to be a week, I'm happy not to be a part of Gillispie's team.

Alex Boone: Sorry I'm not Sorry


Alex Boone, the St. Edwards and Ohio State drinking legend, has continued his partying ways. His legend started back when he was a freshmen at tOSU. After getting arrested for a DUI after plowing into a stopped car, he famously described his drinking habits to the Cleveland Plain Dealer, "I’d have one beer, and it would lead to 24 or 36 — there were weekends when in one night I’d be putting down 40."


Well, Alex is back at it again.



If only he could of handled SEC defensive lineman as well as he pounds Natty Lights...

My Best Cleveland Game Experience

By Randy Kern

So Dan assigned me to write about my favorite game that I’ve ever attended. The problem is, I’m a Cleveland fan, so I don’t really have much to chose from. Therefore, I’m going to cheat a little and discuss a game that I wasn’t technically at (but I might as well have been). But before I get to that, I’ll list my honorable mentions:

- Run William Run. The best moment in new Browns history (how pathetic is that?). Atlanta had already clinched a playoff birth, something they kept reminding them of over the loudspeaker. I speculate that had they needed that win, they would’ve ran with Vick in the red zone and we’d have lost. Anyways, I refrained from drinking any sodas before the game because I didn’t want to have to urinate during it. I was with my brother in law in his yuppy-ass upper deck seats so the crowd experience was nothing special. At least it was loud by the new stadiums standards.

- 00 Win over the Steelers in week 3. Steelers got screwed, the clock should’ve been stopped when they were rushing their kicker onto the field and couldn’t get it off (I forget the logistics but I remember the league apologized for it). I will always remember this because it was my first Browns game, and it was a win over the Steelers. I went home and listened to “Who Let the Dogs Out” for the rest of the afternoon.

- Two games I attended with Blackie in the Dawg Pound in 04. The first was our home opener against the Ravens, the only one we’ve one since our return. I can’t believe how convincing we were that game. Memorable because of the rowdy middle aged guys around us, especially the one with an Eric Turner jersey who called me “Skippy”. If I ranked my honorable mentions, this would probably be #1 Browns game because it was a meaningful win (at the time) and I was in an ideal environment.

The second was week 4 after our season had already been decimated by injuries. We beat the Redskins in a lousy game. This was when my infamous “piss towel” was waved. I love peeing my pants in the Dawg Pound. Especially at the Bills blizzard game in 07 when I did so 6 times.

- Moving onto the Indians. I was at the game where Jim Thome hit 3 homeruns. He was my favorite player so this was a big deal. I think that was 2000. Another great one was a day game I went to with Kerver and Snakes with last minute tickets that were given to us. The seats were great, right behind home plate. My new favorite Indian, Fausto Carmona, pitched an absolute gem.

- I went to two Indians playoff games in 07 with Blackie. They kind of run together in my mind, but the first was the game 1 victory over the Yankees. The second was the game 4 win against the Red Sox. I was impressed by the crowd, particularly do to the fact that I had completely written off Indians fans when they couldn’t sell out the divison clinching win during nice weather a couple weeks earlier.

- The Tigers game at Comerica in 07 deserves a mention simply because it’s the only out of town game I’ve ever attended. The Indians won (obviously, or it wouldn’t be on the list) and the Tiger fans were solid, better than the flimsies you’d find at the Jake. I mean they atleast threw shit at us when we were rubbing it in. Makeshift beer pong in the motel afterward and Howarth’s sleep walking adventure round out a worthwhile trip.

- There’s only one Cavs game that deserves a mention (for now). That would be when the Chosen-King-L-Train danced down the baseline for the buzzer beating layup vs the Wizards in a pivotal game 5. I was sitting in the very top row with Ron, and the crowd was as fired up as I could realistically ask for. While I’m at it, I’ll give an honorable-honorable mention to games 3 and 4 of the Detroit series that same year. This is when I coined “DE-TROIT SUCKS MY BALLS” while patrolling the concourse of the Q before the game.

My favorite Cleveland gaming experience is definitely when the Cavs won the East in 2007. I wasn’t at the game but as downtown for the Party at the Plaza. Basically it was a bunch of big screen TV’s surrounded by a sea of Cavs fans.
Howarth cut his finger off earlier in the day, so he was damned to watching the game with the then mangled Arbaugh under the soupy influence of pain killers.
Most of us were drunk before we were even downtown. Riedle was too embarrassed to walk by the masses when we got on the rapid. I can’t reinterate enough how drunk and baffoonaried the Kerver brothers were for this event. Brett Kerver got into a verbal spat with a Tigers fan on the subway. Krusty would just charge ahead yelling incoherent isms about how Detroit sucks. I’ll never forget when Brett screamed “FUCK!” at the top of his lungs after the Cavs missed their inaugural jump shot of the game.
I recall there being two fairly attractive ladies near us in the crowd. Riedle ended up getting some digits. Me and a few others found their presence to be rather distracting. Kerver was like “if you can’t stop looking at her, just switch to where I’m standing”. Thanks, Kerver..
As the game carried on, the crowd began rearing its blue collared edge. Just constant screams, epiphets, drinking, and excess celebrations for everything the Cavs did. When Boobie started raining 3’s, it was one moshpit after another. Once we wrapped it up, there was a lot of hugging. Full fledged bear hugs with random strangers. Euphoric black dudes who declared they were “WALKING TO SAN ANTONIO, DAMNIT!” People running around in the streets aimlessly.. I can’t count how many ‘De-troit sucks my balls” chants there were. This night was everything I dreamed of a Cleveland sporting event being.
Riedle kind of decided to be a vag at the end and we ended up leaving the “scene” earlier than we would’ve wanted to, but looking back, we celebrated to the nights fullest merit. All we really did was win a very weak conference, its good that we saved some room to grow for when we bring home our first ring.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Holmes' catch great, not amazing

I just read Gregg Doyel's column, who is an idiot by the way, who said Santonio Holmes' game-winning catch was the best EVER. It's not even the best in Steelers franchise history. I'm sorry it was a great catch, but it's one that should be made by an NFL receiver. Take a look at players like Marvin Harrison and Amani Toomer, who have made names for themselves making catches tip-toeing the sideline. It was a better throw than catch if anything. Being part of the media, I understand how things get blown out of proportion, but this is getting out of control. Let me know what you all think as the best catch or your list of best catches ever.

My list includes: The Helmet Catch, Immaculate Reception, Lynn Swann's diving catch then 'The Catch.'

Are the Steelers the best franchise in sports?

I got quite irritated last night listening to ESPN ask this question. The answer is an obvious no. They are nowhere near the best franchise in sports. They are not even the best in franchise in the NFL. I'm not knocking their six Super Bowl titles, but there's more to being the best franchise than six Super Bowl titles. Especially when you were around during the NFL Championship era. Here, in no particular order are franchises I believe are hands down better than the Steelers.

Here notable Steelers stats: a record of 520-488-20. Have appeared in 7 Super Bowls winning, six. They never won an NFL Championship. Their first championship appearance came in 1974, 41 years after being founded. That's not the making of the best franchise ever. In fact they only made the playoffs once before 1972, that came in 1947. Recent history isn't AMAZING either, they've made the playoffs six out of ten years. Not bad, not the best.

1) Boston Celtics-17 NBA Championships in 20 appearances. They were founded in 1946, roughly 13 years after the Steelers. They have recorded a .591 winning percentage and 16 seasons.

2) New York Yankees- 26 World Series titles. 39 Pennants. Founded in 1901 as the Baltimore Orioles, they have won 57 percent of their games. In my opinion, and I hate saying this, probably the best franchise in all of sports.

3) Dallas Cowboys- founded in 1960 and have made eight Super Bowls, winning five. A record of 423-309-6. They have won their division 20 times in 48 years.

4) If you want to call these franchises, UCLA men's basketball and a handful of college football teams.

I'm sorry but the media sucks off Pittsburgh way too much for some reason. Hines Ward is creeping up on KG and Ray Lewis as an 'intensity' guy. They are becoming the Duke of the NFL. They seem to get a lot of the calls and a random bounce goes their way. I'm sorry ESPN I love you, but you're nowhere near the right answer in saying they are the best franchise in sports.

And last night's Super Bowl was NOT the best of all-time. But that's for a later argument...

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Super Bowl Prediction

As a Browns fan this is tough to take seeing our arch rival make it to the Super Bowl for the second time in four years. The Steelers play exactly how I want the Browns to play. They play with an incredibly physical defense, solid run game, and a quarterback that can get out of the pocket and make occasional big plays. And Mike Tomlin is one of my favorite coaches in pro sports. I would love to play for him. Basically, you can say I hate the Steelers but am very jealous of their success.

A couple quick predictions....
1. Arizona will put up more total yards than Pittsburgh.
2. Pittsburgh will have 4+ sacks.
3. Pittsburgh will score a defensive touchdown.

Prop Bets I like
1. Tails on the coin toss.
2. Edgerrin James (+39.5 yards rushing) vs. Willie Parker
3. Larry Fitzgerald (-30.5 yards receiving) vs. Hines Ward

Who will win?
Arizona will move the ball some between the 20s but Pittsburgh defense will stiffen up and make all the big plays. Roethlisberger will get outside the tackles and hit a couple big plays in the passing game taking advantage of overaggressiveness of the Cardinals safeties. Plus, the Steelers fans will make this seem like a home game just like Detroit.

PS Matt Millen picked the Cardinals, obviously I need to go the other way.

Pittsburgh 31
Arizona 17

Best Super Bowls ever

Will today go down as one of the best Super Bowl games ever? I highly doubt it. There will be no 'Helmet Catch,' no Lynn Swan diving catch and no field goal with a second left. But here is my list of the top 5 Super Bowls of all-time. Call me a homer but you can guess what number 1 is.

5) Giants-Broncos (Super Bowl XXI in 1987)- Giants 39-20 Perhaps the most underrated Super Bowl of all-time. Phil Simms goes 22-25 for 268 yards and three touchdowns. He also ran for 25 yards on three carries. There was the Big Blue Wrecking Crew's goal line stand, Mark Bavaro and Joe Morris. On Denver's first drive in the second quarter they get to the Giants 1-yard line. The Wrecking Crew then forced them to lose a yard over the next three plays, resulting in a missed field goal by Rich Karlis. This game was also the coming of a young John Elway, who would later turn into the Elway we all know.

4) 49ers-Bengals (Super Bowl XXIII in 1989) 49ers-20-16 The true showing of Joe Cool by Montana. Trailing 16-13 3:20 left Montana enters the huddle and the first thing he says is "Hey, isn't that John Candy over there?" Over the next three minutes he puts together an 11 play, 92-yard drive to win the game with 39 seconds left.

3) Rams-Titans (Super Bowl XXXIV in 2000) Rams 23-16- The Greatest Show on Turf vs Air McNair. But what will be remembered is a defensive play. McNair hits Kevin Dyson on a slant and gets to the one-yard line before Mike Jones grabs him by the leg to bring him down with no time left. Warner, Bruce, Holt and Faulk showed why they were a great offensive team, but a tackle is what everyone will remember.

2) Giants-Bills (Super Bowl XXV in 1990) Giants 20-19- Wide Right. I shouldn't have to say more, but think about it. Last second field goal to win for Norwood and the Bills and he shanks it. But, there was also O.J. Otis Anderson vs. Thurman Thomas. The Juice puts up 102 yards to win MVP, however Thomas almost became the second player ever to win MVP from the losing team as he had a combined 190 yards and single-handily brought the Bills back. But, Jeff Hoestettler and the the Juice were too much.

1) Giants-Patriots (Super Bowl XLII in 2008) Giants 17-14 It was impossible. Everything about the game. The Pats were too good, their offense wouldn't be stopped, Eli was too inconsistent, the Giants were too big of underdogs. But in the end it was the biggest underdog of them all, Eli and Tyree making the play. People forget how Eli got out of the tackle, then Tyree made the greatest catch ever. No denying that. Plax caught the game winner and the Giants D held on one last time. D-coordinator Steve Spagnolo drew up the perfect game, getting to Brady all the time. It stopped the Patriots dream season and sent Strahan out on the high horse. People say the first three quarters were dull, it was just low scoring. An amazing defensive game, then the lights came on in the fourth. It'll be a while until a game tops this.


Honorable mention: Jets-Colts in Super Bowl III in 1968-Namath guarantees victory
Rams-Patriots in Super Bowl XXXVI in 2002-Hello Tom Brady and Adam Vinaterri
Patriots-Panthers in Super Bowl XXXVIII in 2004-back and forth, Vinaterri again with 4 seconds left, game-winner.

Predictions

It's Super Bowl Sunday and that can only mean a few things, 1) some good commercials 2) a lot of angry fans and 3) predictions. We all know the background stories of both the Steelers and Cardinals. Now it's time to hear what you all think.

I'm going Cardinals 24-21. It's been too weird of a football season for the Steelers to run away with it.