By Randy Kern
So Dan assigned me to write about my favorite game that I’ve ever attended. The problem is, I’m a Cleveland fan, so I don’t really have much to chose from. Therefore, I’m going to cheat a little and discuss a game that I wasn’t technically at (but I might as well have been). But before I get to that, I’ll list my honorable mentions:
- Run William Run. The best moment in new Browns history (how pathetic is that?). Atlanta had already clinched a playoff birth, something they kept reminding them of over the loudspeaker. I speculate that had they needed that win, they would’ve ran with Vick in the red zone and we’d have lost. Anyways, I refrained from drinking any sodas before the game because I didn’t want to have to urinate during it. I was with my brother in law in his yuppy-ass upper deck seats so the crowd experience was nothing special. At least it was loud by the new stadiums standards.
- 00 Win over the Steelers in week 3. Steelers got screwed, the clock should’ve been stopped when they were rushing their kicker onto the field and couldn’t get it off (I forget the logistics but I remember the league apologized for it). I will always remember this because it was my first Browns game, and it was a win over the Steelers. I went home and listened to “Who Let the Dogs Out” for the rest of the afternoon.
- Two games I attended with Blackie in the Dawg Pound in 04. The first was our home opener against the Ravens, the only one we’ve one since our return. I can’t believe how convincing we were that game. Memorable because of the rowdy middle aged guys around us, especially the one with an Eric Turner jersey who called me “Skippy”. If I ranked my honorable mentions, this would probably be #1 Browns game because it was a meaningful win (at the time) and I was in an ideal environment.
The second was week 4 after our season had already been decimated by injuries. We beat the Redskins in a lousy game. This was when my infamous “piss towel” was waved. I love peeing my pants in the Dawg Pound. Especially at the Bills blizzard game in 07 when I did so 6 times.
- Moving onto the Indians. I was at the game where Jim Thome hit 3 homeruns. He was my favorite player so this was a big deal. I think that was 2000. Another great one was a day game I went to with Kerver and Snakes with last minute tickets that were given to us. The seats were great, right behind home plate. My new favorite Indian, Fausto Carmona, pitched an absolute gem.
- I went to two Indians playoff games in 07 with Blackie. They kind of run together in my mind, but the first was the game 1 victory over the Yankees. The second was the game 4 win against the Red Sox. I was impressed by the crowd, particularly do to the fact that I had completely written off Indians fans when they couldn’t sell out the divison clinching win during nice weather a couple weeks earlier.
- The Tigers game at Comerica in 07 deserves a mention simply because it’s the only out of town game I’ve ever attended. The Indians won (obviously, or it wouldn’t be on the list) and the Tiger fans were solid, better than the flimsies you’d find at the Jake. I mean they atleast threw shit at us when we were rubbing it in. Makeshift beer pong in the motel afterward and Howarth’s sleep walking adventure round out a worthwhile trip.
- There’s only one Cavs game that deserves a mention (for now). That would be when the Chosen-King-L-Train danced down the baseline for the buzzer beating layup vs the Wizards in a pivotal game 5. I was sitting in the very top row with Ron, and the crowd was as fired up as I could realistically ask for. While I’m at it, I’ll give an honorable-honorable mention to games 3 and 4 of the Detroit series that same year. This is when I coined “DE-TROIT SUCKS MY BALLS” while patrolling the concourse of the Q before the game.
My favorite Cleveland gaming experience is definitely when the Cavs won the East in 2007. I wasn’t at the game but as downtown for the Party at the Plaza. Basically it was a bunch of big screen TV’s surrounded by a sea of Cavs fans.
Howarth cut his finger off earlier in the day, so he was damned to watching the game with the then mangled Arbaugh under the soupy influence of pain killers.
Most of us were drunk before we were even downtown. Riedle was too embarrassed to walk by the masses when we got on the rapid. I can’t reinterate enough how drunk and baffoonaried the Kerver brothers were for this event. Brett Kerver got into a verbal spat with a Tigers fan on the subway. Krusty would just charge ahead yelling incoherent isms about how Detroit sucks. I’ll never forget when Brett screamed “FUCK!” at the top of his lungs after the Cavs missed their inaugural jump shot of the game.
I recall there being two fairly attractive ladies near us in the crowd. Riedle ended up getting some digits. Me and a few others found their presence to be rather distracting. Kerver was like “if you can’t stop looking at her, just switch to where I’m standing”. Thanks, Kerver..
As the game carried on, the crowd began rearing its blue collared edge. Just constant screams, epiphets, drinking, and excess celebrations for everything the Cavs did. When Boobie started raining 3’s, it was one moshpit after another. Once we wrapped it up, there was a lot of hugging. Full fledged bear hugs with random strangers. Euphoric black dudes who declared they were “WALKING TO SAN ANTONIO, DAMNIT!” People running around in the streets aimlessly.. I can’t count how many ‘De-troit sucks my balls” chants there were. This night was everything I dreamed of a Cleveland sporting event being.
Riedle kind of decided to be a vag at the end and we ended up leaving the “scene” earlier than we would’ve wanted to, but looking back, we celebrated to the nights fullest merit. All we really did was win a very weak conference, its good that we saved some room to grow for when we bring home our first ring.
