* Actually ceased to exist, not just the oblivion of having every game be a 1pm game with a former mediocre AFC West quarterback doing the games.
My Pick: The Eagles
Why the Eagles? Here are four reasons.
1. The Fans - Eagles fans have the reputation of being crude and hostile. I really like that. I want opposing fans to be scared to come to my home stadium. At the very least a Giants fan should get a beer spilled on him. If hes one of those incredibly douchey ones that still wears a Shockey jersey, he should definitely get an ass beating in the upper deck. Also, the "Fly Eagles Fly" song is kind of catchy and I would definitely belt it out drunkenly.
2. Suffering - I can empathize with a fanbase that hasn't won anything since Norm Van Brocklin was quarterbacking for them. I couldn't be a frontrunner and jump on a team like the Saints or Patriots. I need a fanbase that feels suffering.
3. Andy Reid is Fat - I like having a coach that has a trait that you can easily rip on. When Romeo Crennel was the head coach of the Browns everything that went wrong we blamed on him being a barge. So when Andy Reid mismanages the game clock for like 430th time you have something easy to bitch about, "That fatass was too busy thinking about the postgame spread to realize the playclock was at zero." See, I told you I like suffering and overweight coaches.
4. Madden - Over the years I have played with the Eagles because I like playing with a mobile QB, Donovan McNabb. In the 2011 game, I have liked the Eagles because of a mobile QB (Vick), good receiving RB (McCoy) and fast WR (Jackson and Maclin).
If your favorite team spontaneously combusted and you had to choose a new team, who would it be?
6 comments:
Since this is such a hypothetical question and I have never really pictured the scenario, I am having a hard time narrowing this down. Of course, the Colts have been known to disappear into the night so maybe I should be ready. My choice may seem like it comes out of left field:
The San Francisco 49ers. They are a young team and Mike Singletary has them moving in the right direction. Here are my reasons:
1. At the age of 10 I laced up my cleats for the first time, put on my pads, and draped over it a 49ers jersey. My love for the game started in Pop Warner playing for the 49ers. Because of this, one of the first jerseys I owned was a Steve Young jersey. And yes, our D was as stingy as Mike Singletary's. Unfortunately it was not this stingy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhxK8P0h5Fk&feature=player_embedded
2. Madden 1997 for Nintendo 64... The first football video game I owned. Steve Young, Jerry Rice, Terrell Owens, Garrison Hearst, Rod Woodson.
3. Frank Gore. I LOVE the way Frank Gore runs. He lowers his shoulders, hits holes ferociously, and his cuts are quick and effective. He makes guys miss while still moving downhill at almost max speed. With the 49ers passing game still a work in progress teams can stack eight in the box and Gore steps up to the challenge. Most importantly, he is 100% every play, always fighting for more yards and continuing to move his feet. Now that I have proclaimed my mancrush on Frank Gore (insert San Francisco joke here)...
4. The linebacking corps, my other favorite position. Despite a terrible game defensively the 49ers are still ranked 4th in total defense allowed and 6th in rushing yards allowed. They came out and hit the world champion Saints in the mouth and almost pulled off a win. Patrick Willis's size and speed combination is untouchable, and his ability to quarterback the defense as such a young player impresses the hell out of me. He led the league in tackles last year and has been a pro bowler all three years he has been in the league. And of course I must mention my fellow Auburn man TKO Spikes. Good to see him healthy and not playing for the Bengals.
As much as this might be blasphemy, I'd definitely root for the Steelers. I don't really hate them anymore, my dad has always been a huge fan, and I feel like they are just the successful version of the Browns. With that said, their city still smells like open ass, and they have Ben Rapistberger. So fuck them and wake me up when the Browns are relevant again.
Thought about this one long and hard during the work day. I think I'd have to go with the Seahawks. Similair reasons to Dan:
1) Their coach - Pete Carroll is a lunatic. He could do anything and it wouldn't surprise me. I like having him to cheer for.
2) Their fans - commonly known as being the loudest stadium in the NFL, I like their intensity.
3) The suffering - Seattle would blow the roof off if they ever win a Super Bowl, especially after being screwed agaisnt the Steelers in XL.
The finalists: Vikings, but Brett Favre ruined that. Dolphins, but too trendy for fans. Kansas City.
Well my 2nd favorite franchise is the Panthers, but if there were no Browns thats prolly not who I'd "chose" to be a fan of.
Here's some teams I'd consider:
Steelers - Cold weather outdoor teams will monopolize this list and it begins here. Basically a succesful version of the Browns, as already stated. I like their uniforms and their blue collared fanbase. I also like the defenses they've built. Polamalu is one of my favorite athletes. Cowher is my all time favorite coach. But would I really want a team thats that succesful? It sounds stupid but in a way I'd rather cheer for a loser, maybe because thats all I know...
Packers - Another succesful franchise that fits most of the Steelers criteria. Aaron Rodgers is my favorite QB ever. Favre will prevent this team from being #1.
Eagles - Howarth was right on when he emphasized the importance of rowdy rans suffering for success. Thats what I know and love, thats what I can relate to.
Bears - See Packers, Steelers
Raiders - See Eagles. Big downfall here is that they moved to LA for one of their Superbowls, having Al Davis as an owner would make me feel insecure. And I would't like how they don't sell out games.
Bills - In terms of style and success, they are the franchise most similar to the Browns.
Giants - I've always liked them more than the Jets, and I figure a New York crowd should fit my needs. Beating the undefeated Patriots in the Superbowl would be better to me than a dynasty.
If the Browns were to dissapear today, I'd just casually pull for the Panthers over the rest of the league. Had the Browns never existed and I were to CHOSE which franchise I'd be a fan of, here's how I'd rank them:
1 Eagles
2 Steelers
3 Packers
4 Raiders
5 Bears
I liked two of Bobby's honorable mentions...
Dolphins - Bill Parcells
Kansas City - Sickest tailgating in the NFL.
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